Spotless Mind (yep, movie inspired!)

Spotless Mind
© Meesa Caudill


At this point in all our lives
we've all been deeply burned-
worlds have been flipped upside down,
we've suffered tremendous hurt.
We've all been through hell,
sometimes twice, and back again-
tried to swear off love,
enjoyed our fun living in sin.
Some of us are free to bare our scars-
most wear them like badges-
some people try to hide them-
cover them with emotional patches.

If only we could forget old wounds,
somehow wipe the slate clean.
New love wouldn't suffer sins of the old,
in fights, we wouldn't be so mean.
We live our lives & try to heal the pain,
hoping to leave our memories behind.
Wanting so badly to forget the pain...
Eternal Sunshine of A Spotless Mind.

We've built up concrete walls to our hearts,
hoping someone strong could tear them down.
With each new love we hope and pray
but they never stick around.
We push them away or we choose to run,
heart is too fragile for another crack.
If we lose ourselves to love again,
we may never find our way back.
So we carry on trying to heal the pain,
heal the damage that's been done to our soul.
We want so badly to forget the past,
unsuccessful at letting it go.

If only we could forget old wounds,
somehow wipe the slate clean.
New love wouldn't suffer sins of the old,
in fights, we wouldn't be so mean.
We live our lives & try to heal the pain,
hoping to leave our memories behind.
Wanting so badly to forget the pain...
Eternal Sunshine of A Spotless Mind.

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Sleepy thoughts...

Sleepy Thoughts
© Meesa Caudill


Echos of memories
thunder through my head-
lyrics of sad songs
fill my thoughts in this bed.
These lonely, empty rooms
occupied only with ghosts from the past-
they're the only company I keep,
the only relationships that last.
Haunted always by yesterday,
full of fear of tomorrow-
pillows damp with tears,
soaked in all my sorrows.
Prayers answered strangely
but never how they were prayed-
I'll go on reminding myself
that God works in His own way.
So for now the sad songs keep playing
as I lie alone in bed,
praying for the echos to be silenced
and for the thunder to stop in my head.

Seventeen

4 a.m., alone again, in front of this old computer screen...
playing songs that take me back to the days of seventeen.
I was young and wild- the taste of freedom exciting & new...
didn't have a care in the world... and all I wanted was you.
I gave you my heart that winter, gave you my soul that spring...
you gave me a key to keep around my neck, years later you gave me a ring.
We promised each other forever, not knowing forever just wouldn't be-
and now I sit here so many years later, ghosts of the past still haunting me.
Real love has evaded me since you, true emotion I can't seem to find.
I've been told that I'm too guarded, they tell me my wall is too high.
No one even dares to climb it, they damn sure don't try to tear it down-
I guess they know that once they cross it, your ghost is still around.